Having the right things to talk about with your crush can make both of you feel closer. And it’ll also make them think of you when you aren’t around!
If you like someone, you may tend to clam up and get nervous around them. But if you have things to talk about with your crush, it will make growing closer a lot easier.
Honestly, talking to your crush is nerve-racking. You may feel awkward or even a bit sweaty, however cool and composed you are. And that is totally and completely normal. Everyone is intimidated and nervous around someone they like.
The best thing to do in these situations is to relax. It’s easier said than done, but really letting go of all the worry and self-doubt is what makes talking to your crush easier and more natural.
Once you learn to let go of your fears and insecurities, you’ll find plenty of things to talk about with your crush.
Stop worrying about talking to your crush
This is the first thing you need to remember. When you talk to your crush and you’re nervous, you’ll struggle to feel comfortable. And when you’re constantly worried about what they think of you, and if they like you, you don’t focus on if you like them.
Talking to your crush isn’t just about getting them to like you, but ensuring you like them. A crush isn’t love or a deep connection. It is usually kicked off by physical attraction and maybe some flirtation.
Instead of worrying about how they feel about you, get to know them first. Focusing too heavily on if you say or do the right thing will only make you come off stiff and unsure of yourself.
Be confident in yourself. Take time to listen to their answers to your questions and to really answer theirs. Once you can calm down about seeming a certain way, you can talk about things that will really matter.
Instead of fearing being rejected, think about just getting to know your crush. You aren’t necessarily asking them out. You’re likely texting or just chatting at work or school.
Let this be an introduction to maybe a date in the future. It isn’t a risk. You aren’t putting yourself on the line. You’re getting to know someone. And who knows? Maybe once you learn more about them, you may realize they like you too, or you may realize you don’t like them as much.
Anything can happen and just talking to your crush means there aren’t expectations. Don’t worry that they won’t like you, or things won’t work out. This is just the start of you two getting to know each other, so keep that in mind. It will help you relax and focus on the conversation more than your worries.
The best things to talk about with your crush – Get to know them and leave them thinking of you!
Getting closer with your crush is the goal. You want them to get to know you, and you want to learn more about them.
That means the things you talk about with your crush shouldn’t be lies or exaggerations. You don’t need to impress them or talk about things you have no interest in, just to seem interesting.
Don’t worry about them not having the same feelings that you do. This is what makes it all so scary. Instead, focus on sharing who you are and what’s important to you. When you talk about your passions, your true self comes out and your confidence shows.
There are plenty of things to talk about with your crush that will lead to a deeper conversation and a potential connection.
If you’re too nervous to think of anything on your own, here are tons of ideas to get you started. Anything that catches your attention will help you feel more comfortable and natural when talking to your crush.
These are things to talk about with your crush so you can find out what drives them crazy in both a good way and bad. You can also find out what they are looking for in life and what things they want from the person they give their heart to.
You can share your own stories or ask about their life and interests, just be sure to really pay attention and interact. Don’t just rattle off questions and answers to fill the silence.
#1 Something your parents don’t know about you. Admitting something your parents don’t know about you, like that time you snuck out or tried something you shouldn’t have, gives your crush an inside look at you. This is something that is like a secret and sharing that bonds you. [Read: 10 strategic moves you must master to get closer to your crush]
#2 Your closest friend. Talking about your closest friends brings out the best in you. When you’re sharing why the important people in your life are important, you light up and show the best parts of you. Letting each other get to know who you surround yourself with, shows a lot about you.
#3 Your favorite cuisine or restaurant. People are passionate about their food. Talking about your favorite things to eat, cook, and restaurants to go to, can help you bond and open your horizons. Maybe you both share the same cuisine, that would make it really easy to ask your crush out too!
#4 Your biggest pet peeve. This could shut down your crush right away, or it could be a funny way to share a laugh.
#5 Your cooking abilities. It is always impressive when someone knows how to cook. Share your favorite dishes to make. Are you more of a chef or a baker?
#6 Your weird habits. Do you eat chips with your ice cream? Maybe your crush is addicted to cherry lip balm? Sharing your weird habits brings you closer together.
#7 Your favorite movie or TV show from childhood. There is nothing like nostalgia to connect you, especially when you’re looking for things to talk about with your crush. Talking about old game shows, childhood stars your idolized and cult-classic movies will help you click.
#8 Where you grew up. Discussing your hometown is very intimate. It is a place you feel safe, and talking about it and opening up about it, will show you at your best.
#9 Causes you support. The causes you’re passionate about are so important to you. Discussing these topics with your crush and having an open-minded discussion about them lets you get to know each other on another level.
#10 The best concert you’ve ever been to. Music is a big part of our lives. Sharing your favorite musical experiences with each other bonds you over something deeper.
#11 Your first job. This is always a fun story to talk about with your crush, and it is something that surely helped you grow. Talking about this lets you both learn about what your first experience with responsibility was.
#12 Your next big life goal. Getting to know one another isn’t all about the past, but also the future. Discussing where you see yourself headed will let you know if you have similar goals for your lives.
#13 The most underrated actor. People have strong feelings about actors, especially their favorites. Talking about actors you love helps you find common ground and things to disagree on. These simple conversations help you find out if your crush can grow into more.
#14 A movie you hate that everyone else loves. Is it a musical or a horror or an award winner? Butting heads over this helps you grow together and be open-minded and even tease each other.
#15 Trends you find bizarre. There are a lot of trends out there now. Which do you two find weird? What don’t you get? The TikTok dance videos? The dad sneakers?
#16 A book that changed your life. We all have a favorite book and they touch us deeply. Sharing that part of your life when looking for things to talk about with your crush helps you open up and show some vulnerability.
#17 If your pet had to name you, what name would they pick? Talking about your pets is amazing. It makes you so happy. Show your crush pictures and videos of them. And answering this question is super fun.
#18 What do you admire most in people? Honesty? Dependability? What is important to you and to your crush? Do you have those qualities?
#19 Your weirdest fear. Not your biggest fear, because that could be a little bit intense for conversation with a crush, but your most irrational fear. Clowns? The dark?
#20 What are you passionate about? Do you love to paint? Maybe your crush is into sculpting? Sharing your passions is so important.
#21 What sports do you play or wish you played? Do you ever wish you learned how to play softball? Maybe you’re great at soccer? Do you both love a certain sport?
#22 Your favorite place to visit? Is it your hometown or the city? Do you love to travel to Europe or the beach? Do you both love the rush of a city or the calmness of the mountains?
#23 The social media apps you don’t understand. Do you not get TikTok? Are you more of a Facebook person? This is one of those perfect things to talk about with your crush because there’s so much to discuss and laugh about together!
#24 Your relationships with your family. Are you close with your siblings? Do you talk to your extended family often? Families are so important to us and opening up about that to your crush and having them share with you is very intimate and can take this from a crush to more.
#25 Your holiday traditions. What are your favorite traditions for Christmas and New Years’? Do you share any customs?
#26 Your experiences with online dating. My boyfriend and I bonded over our miserable dating experiences on our first date. Knowing you’ve been through similar things is a great way to connect.
#27 What helps you relax? Do they like taking a bubble bath? Do you like getting your adrenaline going? Can you relax together?
#28 What you look for in a partner. This could be a little premature but I don’t think it’s ever too early to talk about what you want. Maybe you two are better as friends but sharing what you look for in a partner will help you get that answer.
#29 Compliment them sincerely. Offering them a compliment like they are smart or attractive is nice, but very generic. If you want to compliment them to show your interest, offer up something personal to them.
#30 If you prefer calling or texting. If your crush turns into more, you may be talking pretty regularly. In that case, you’ll want to know what form of communication works best for both of you.
#31 Do you believe in ghosts? Get to know some more bizarre things about each other. Not everything you talk about needs to be serious or deep.
#32 Your comfort level with hanging out during the pandemic. This wasn’t even something to think about let alone talk about before 2020, but now it’s necessary. If you’re not vaccinated, you need to discuss how comfortable you are meeting up and seeing each other.
#33 Your love languages. This can seem intimate for a crush, but this is helpful for friendships and even for coworkers. Knowing how you both give and receive one and admiration is important when it comes to how you treat each other.
#34 Most embarrassing or favorite tattoo. Do you have a tattoo no one would ever imagine? Maybe one you regret or one you think is hilarious or meaningful?
#35 Your unrealistic dream job. If money was no object and you could do anything in the world, what would it be? A space cowboy?
#36 The best fandom: Harry Potter, Twilight, Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones, etc. People get intense about these things, so keep it light. You don’t want to piss your crush off! But if you align on these hot topics, you’re golden.
#37 Do you believe in soulmates and fate? This says a lot about how you view the world and your life. Is it all free will or are there things out of our control?
#38 Your biggest guilty pleasure. Do you love watching the Real Housewives? Maybe you’re vegetarian but you secretly indulge in a burger every now and again. Admitting these things offers a level of secrecy between you two.
#39 Do you love or hate social media? Whether you’re on social media or not, everyone has opinions about it. Is it all bad? Is it great for staying in touch? Can it be inspiring and connecting or is it full of bullies and lies?
#40 What topic do you know the most about? This is one of those things to talk about with your crush that’ll leave them beaming. After all, how often do you get to talk about the things you know really well! Did you learn a ton about the solar system as a kid or maybe dinosaurs and it stuck with you? Maybe your crush knows a ton about farm animals because they lived on their grandparents’ farm as a kid in the summer.
#41 Did you enjoy high school? Was high school fun and filled with good memories or was it a place you couldn’t wait to leave? Did you share similar school experiences? Maybe you can help each other see the other side?
#42 What are your dating dealbreakers? This is a no-brainer. It’s important to get these things out of the way while it’s still a crush, so neither of you wastes your time.
#43 How do you feel about your parents’ relationship? Do you admire their connection and marriage? Did you learn from their mistakes? Do you wish they did more or less?
Knowing the right things to talk about with your crush can be worrisome, but if you discuss any of these topics, you’ll only grow your connection and feel closer than ever in just a few conversations!